Taking a quick break for breakfast. Thought I'd better post this before I forgot again.
So last night in a bout of insomnia, my brain wandered freely and wide over the internets, and I came upon the site of the
Official Monster Raving Loony Party. Now why can't we have political parties like that in this country? Or are the established parties already so insane as to defy parody?
From here, I came (eventually) to the
1999 policies of the
McGillicuddy Serious Party of New Zealand. Now
here's a party! The core of their philiosophy is Funism - the most fun for the most people - and their governmental program is based on accomplishing this through
The Great Leap Backwards™.
Again, why can't we have political parties like that in this country?
Darn it, I think it's time to resurrect the sadly defunct Whig Party and start writing a manifesto!
(Why Whigs? They were a major party, once; their name is really kind of silly; it's time to reclaim the letter W.)
While I very much admire the McGillicuddy Serious Party's basic philosophy, we will need to make some changes to account for American insensibilites and to bring it up to date for these trying times.
Frankly, that's way more work than I want to do right now. That will require, I suspect, a new barbeque, much beer, and a select group of Whigs. So I'm thinking Spring some time.
For now, I'll simply propose a plank for the platform, as it were, on a minor issue.
Proposed Plank 0001: Male Head Covering
Hats are a civilizing influence on the male of the species, therefore the Whig Party will seek to enact local and national laws strongly encouraging men to wear hats in public. This may include such enforcement provisions as tax exemption for haberdasheries and for television and film productions where all male characters wear hats in public. Men shall not be compelled to wear hats, but they'll look pretty silly if they don't. For the purposes of these laws, baseball caps are not hats. They are appropriate only when actually playing baseball or golf, or perhaps while gardening.
I can hardly wait for somebody to write the plank on the reinstitution of duelling.