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This morning, I found on my desk a poor quality photocopy, obviously multi-generational and enlarged at some point. This is what it said:
20B. - History of Philosophy - Mr. Matson
a. About seven short papers will be required, both in and out of quiz sections. There will be a final, but no midterm and no term paper.
b. GENERAL DESCRIPTION AND SOUVENIR PROGRAM
1. THE AMAZING MONSIEUR D E S C A R T E S will pull HIMSELF out of HIS OWN HAT, and then SAW HIMSELF IN TWO! The Same Performance as Presented BY ROYAL COMMAND before H. M. THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN!
2. SEE in our GIGANTIC TANK the Monstrous LEVIATHAN! Supported AT ENORMOUS EXPENSE, he is GREATER THAN EVERYBODY ELSE PUT TOGETHER! (The Audience is Kindly Requested to Maintain a Reverent Attitude.)
3. SHUDDER IN HORROR at THAT FAMOUS ATHEIST S P I N O Z A and his HIDEOUS HYPOTHESIS!
4. The Gorgeous Musical Extravaganza, "IN THE BEST OF ALL POSSIBLE WORLDS!" Gottfried L E I B N I T Z and his Pre-established Harmoneers.
INTERMISSION. Mr. John L O C K E will pass among you with a Plenteous Supply of REAL OLD-FASHIONED SIMPLE SUBSTANCES. Guaranteed PRIMARY QUALITY and CHOCK FULL O' POWER. (Secondary Qualities may be obtained at reduced rates after the performance.)
5. LAUGH with those Lovable Irish Clowns, HYLAS AND PHILONOUS, as they Abolish Matter and BRING DOWN THE HOUSE!
6. THRILL to the Death-Defying INDUCTIVE LEAP! THE GREAT HUME uses ABSOLUTELY NO SUBSTRATUM!
7. GRAND FINALE. Professor IMMANUEL K A N T, BLINDFOLDED, will Deduce TWELVE CATEGORIES and Solve THREE TRANSCENDENTAL PROBLEMS While Simultaneously Juggling FOUR THESES AND FOUR ANTITHESES.
* * * * *
I consider this a good omen for today.
20B. - History of Philosophy - Mr. Matson
a. About seven short papers will be required, both in and out of quiz sections. There will be a final, but no midterm and no term paper.
b. GENERAL DESCRIPTION AND SOUVENIR PROGRAM
1. THE AMAZING MONSIEUR D E S C A R T E S will pull HIMSELF out of HIS OWN HAT, and then SAW HIMSELF IN TWO! The Same Performance as Presented BY ROYAL COMMAND before H. M. THE QUEEN OF SWEDEN!
2. SEE in our GIGANTIC TANK the Monstrous LEVIATHAN! Supported AT ENORMOUS EXPENSE, he is GREATER THAN EVERYBODY ELSE PUT TOGETHER! (The Audience is Kindly Requested to Maintain a Reverent Attitude.)
3. SHUDDER IN HORROR at THAT FAMOUS ATHEIST S P I N O Z A and his HIDEOUS HYPOTHESIS!
4. The Gorgeous Musical Extravaganza, "IN THE BEST OF ALL POSSIBLE WORLDS!" Gottfried L E I B N I T Z and his Pre-established Harmoneers.
INTERMISSION. Mr. John L O C K E will pass among you with a Plenteous Supply of REAL OLD-FASHIONED SIMPLE SUBSTANCES. Guaranteed PRIMARY QUALITY and CHOCK FULL O' POWER. (Secondary Qualities may be obtained at reduced rates after the performance.)
5. LAUGH with those Lovable Irish Clowns, HYLAS AND PHILONOUS, as they Abolish Matter and BRING DOWN THE HOUSE!
6. THRILL to the Death-Defying INDUCTIVE LEAP! THE GREAT HUME uses ABSOLUTELY NO SUBSTRATUM!
7. GRAND FINALE. Professor IMMANUEL K A N T, BLINDFOLDED, will Deduce TWELVE CATEGORIES and Solve THREE TRANSCENDENTAL PROBLEMS While Simultaneously Juggling FOUR THESES AND FOUR ANTITHESES.
* * * * *
I consider this a good omen for today.
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(no subject)
Date: 2005-07-01 07:17 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-07-01 07:33 pm (UTC)Of course, it took me four hours to track down the culprit. That's more my fault than hers, however.
Speaking of which... who are you?
for the benefit of Mr. Kant
Date: 2005-07-01 08:56 pm (UTC)